Just married and sex isnt part of our relationship

Ive been married for 4 months now and we dating for the last 2 years. She is a girl I knew of in High school but never really had a conversation. We hooked up 20 years later and began to date. In the beginning it was new and fun. She told me she has been in love with me since 1986. She even sprayed paint of our names on a wall with a heart in 86 and took a picture of it and also kept it. So in a weird sense we were meant to be together.

As I said in the beginning it was great and 2 months into our relationship things started to become weird. Most people I believe have same issues as all relationships are not easy. We dated and broke up twice and blah blah blah we got back together and I asked her to marry me because I was in love with her and wanted to spend the rest of my life with her.

The sex was good not great as I have a high drive and more into crazier things but still good. A year goes by and all seems great then we get hitched and not even a week later reality set in. She expressed she isn't happy with her job and our finances aren't what they use to be. Our house is to expensive now and health care and bills seem to be more expensive. We started having sex after married about once a week and then it became once every two weeks.

Every time I bring sex up she says its not all about me and we got into a argument and I expressed that she might love me but she doesn't really like me. I told her she never wants to have sex and she doesn't want me. In our fit she admitted to not wanting sex from me. It crushed me because I believe sex is a major communication of love and affection. Our sex sucks and if she isn't into it I fake orgasm just to stop. I can get off any time of day, which I do anyways but whats the point of sex if your wife isn't into it.

I was married before in a sexless marriage because I wanted it all the time and was an asshole about it. Now I just want it twice a week and if I don't get it I get mad just to myself because whats the point. I cant make someone want me. So I began to watch more porn and fantasize about other encounters I have had in the past. I don't know what to do because she seems not to care and I guess I am scare that she really doesn't want me and I don't want to have another failed marriage. I know communication is the key but also hard again if the other person only cares to what she wants not what is best for the relationship. I am 40 and she is a year behind me. You would think she would hit her prime but I thing that's a myth.

I believe I am attractive but sometime think its me and I just don't do it for her. I am 6-4 no beer belly, keep fit and been blessed with good health and no complaints with my equipment.

We hardly kiss just one in the morning and at night. Holding hands only happens if I initiate it, cuddling she doesn't like to do but if theres a dog in the room she is all for cuddling. The phrase I love you to me now is a good morning and a goodnight with little to no meaning.

I also have a thought she got married to me for the wrong reasons and that she would never admit to what I believe is true. What to do and do I be a good husband and wait and hope she finds happiness? Do I just do my own thing and masturbate till my hands falls off?

Most other woman I know are freaking horny and want sex all the time. I also know other women who really dont like their husbands and still have sex with the to fill their need. I picked a girl who isn't happy and doesn't want me sexually. I think maybe I didn't speak out before marring her because she very very attractive?

Anyone care to help me figure out what a good husband should do?

Thanks

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Source: http://relationship.supportgroups.com/sg/relationship/just-married-and-sex-isnt-part-of-our

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